Day 171 – Positives

Today is a positive just all about me, and I am proud of my accomplishments. Today was our LG’s first full afternoon at nursery after her trial sessions. I went with my parents to drop her off and so the staff could meet them as they will then have met all the main people who will drop off or collect. My LG took me to her coat peg and whilst I was introducing my parents to the staff she went off and started playing, no goodbye, miss you, love you daddy nothing. I should perhaps backtrack here 10 minutes to when she was getting into the car and her voice wavered a little as she said I will miss you daddy and I replied remember even when we are apart there is a piece of my heart in you and………..she replied a piece of my heart in you daddy. So I said we will never totally be apart. It stems from a chain my wife bought me for Christmas and a bracelet I bought her both of which read “There is this girl she stole my heart” mine finishes saying “she calls me daddy” and my wife’s “and changed my name to mummy” spookily close and since then we have told our LG that it means we carry one another with us. Well I digress as I often do, anyway I went and found my LG gave her a big hug and a kiss and she said Daddy I love you remember that. Here comes my positive from today – I left with a choke in the back of my throat but no tears in my eyes – I was proud of myself and strong as I waved to her and blew her a kiss through the window.

Now some may say this is sad but with how emotional my meds can make me at times I was very proud of myself today.

I must also mention today’s positive being the visit of an old school friend and one of my wife’s best friends N who popped over to keep me company, and join us for lunch. It is always lovely having company and even better having company that I do not need to pretend with, hide cushion city from or give up my comfortable space for. Without some of our famiends we really would be lost!

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