Finally the reason can be revealed why I have been so tired and missing my positives. I have been working with the Wymondham Access Group that I helped set up in March this year to improve access to my hometown. Having accepted my own disability and the issues I face daily I wanted to give back to the local community I grew up in and help improve the lives of others in the community. We have in a short amount of time worked on a number of projects in the local community and recently I have been working hard to submit a bid for funds from the Aviva Community Fund to improve access at our local swimming pool.
Swimming and hydrotherapy is something that is so beneficial to a wide variety of people, not only is it a life saver for everyone to be able to swim, people of all ages will benefit with improved access. The pod is designed to help so many different people, parents with children who cannot climb down the steps carrying them, pregnant people who find traditional access difficult, those with visual impairments, people undergoing physio and rehabilitating following an injury, anyone with a mobility issue, wheelchair users right through to the oldest members of our society. You can vote for the project by clicking Here
This weekend went past in a blur on Saturday we visited Granny with the white hair and although she said she wasn’t happy in the home she looked healthier than she has in a long time. Primarily because she is eating regularly and taking all her meds on time. It was really hard to see her upset, especially when seeing how well she was. She even walked further without stopping than I can manage something at 92 almost I would be proud of (although at 38 not so much) and she hasn’t done that in a long time.
On Sunday my mate D came over for a coffee and to set the world to rights. In the evening I enjoyed talking dinosaurs with my LG for her homework and helped her remember some facts about her favourite meat eater and plant eater.
Today I managed to fire off a few emails and also with help, and the lovely new low oven and large hob cooked fajitas for tea, and got the proof for our LG’s first official school photo shoot. Watch this space the obligatory sharing of said photo with famiends when the 89,000 image pack arrives (I may have exaggerated a little on the number).
OK, I need to set a date to change over, but I like even numbers or definite stops also I was super happy and proud with the pictures my LG chose to colour in at nursery on Friday so wanted to share them. I am positive that a life with disability is having a good impact on my family and friends even if the pain is at times highly frustrating to put it politely. Well done nursery for having the images available too.
Life is really crazy at the moment, this week is flying by and I just cannot keep up with all the achievements and positives. It is a bizarre statement because as I sit here, mind whirling and pain spiking I am struggling to make sense of it all.
When I reflect back on the year the flat lows back in February when I heard I was losing the one decently accessible playing park and field and the tears I shed with my LG, to where I am today and the things I have achieved it all seems surreal. It doesn’t seem from those dark gloomy days and feelings of hopelessness to the creation of Wymondham Access Group and this week meeting Mark Harrison the CEO of Equal Lives and having him describe me as dynamic, inspirational and a credit to the community is mind blowing. I lost, for many years, all self esteem, I became riddled with self doubt and a lack of self worth. I am very good at acting but occasionally the veil slips the vulnerability slips through.
As I reflect on the year so far it seems like I have already ran a marathon, and I also have another to run over the next couple of months. I promise to reveal more next Thursday but until now my lips are sealed. All will become apparent! I will be reluctantly blogging off for a period as I need to stay healthy (the irony of that phrase, but healthy for me) and focussed on a project so for a month I will go. Please readers stay with me though as I will be back, and I will no doubt share some updates of the project which will explain my absence.
Rambling, I get back to my positives firstly I had a lovely afternoon looking after my niece and spending some time with my younger brother and his family. I am blessed with people around me and never see one another as often as I wish with all my family and friends but life gets in the way, I wish it didn’t but it does.
I desperately need to write some more blogs and not necessarily these everyday, as I feel you only get a snap shot of my day as opposed to the full me.
Maybe two years was long enough, maybe I should do weekly positives and daily mood blogs #selfdoubtcreepingin
Today has been a day of 2 halves, both of which have had me beaming with joy, but that warrant two separate blogs. Given the choice my positive comes from this morning as it was a personal achievement or milestone of my LG’s short lifetime, and therefore takes priority.
This morning was her first ever class assembly or autumn festival as they called it. Being that one awkward parent in a wheelchair (I jest, the school are fantastic and caring) we had our own VIP entrance (again I jest, we had to use the slope and not the stepped entrance). Getting in the classroom the chairs were out for all the parents with a gap for me to park up. Little touches like this mean a lot to me, it saves on the awkward asking to have chairs moved, and wherever they move them are then always in the way. They then positioned our LG in front of us, so we could see her. Brilliant, I was over the moon and as she sat there smiling and waving at me and my wife I was over the moon and beaming with joy.
Then they started talking about all the things that they have been learning in the 3 and a half weeks they have been there. They sung two songs, my LG loves singing and she remembered all the words, and actions and you could hear her really clearly, beaming even more. She held up a picture of a hedgehog that she had made out of leaves and glitter and told everyone how she had done it with a LB who just so happened to be our next door neighbours grandson. I was even proud of how well she sat there throughout, well behaved, a few cheeky smiles and waves and politely putting her hand up to answer questions.
On top of all this a couple of other mums spoke to us about our LG going round to play with their children, not only is she doing really well, she is more importantly making friends. I left buzzing, she is such a little star and bring joy to me everyday, today I was proud and all those doubts I have about the way my disability impacts on her melted away. I was invited to others (acceptance) and my LG showed how rounded she is, we even left her nursery to her proudly telling me that she used the toilets at the nursery for the first time today all on her own.
A real day of being #prouddaddy